just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
she peed on how many people?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
