what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
