The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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