Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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