called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
