We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
