would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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