i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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