Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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