Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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