just come out here and I will go home with you...
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
