I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
