she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
