it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
