Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
