you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
