I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Randomize
