oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
