my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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