I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize