the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize