Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
