just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
