are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
