we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
