I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
