My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
