He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I think people are normalizing furries
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize