i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize