They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm just crazy horny about you
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
