So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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