So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
