I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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