What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I need to sanitize my soul.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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