Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
