i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
