I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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