you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
