I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
