I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize