I wish I could teleport
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize