Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
