I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
