I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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