Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
