I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
