I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
