youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
