There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
