fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
